So…. I sat down and had a talk with my mom this week. She already knows I’m poly, and she already knows that I have Alan in my life. I told her I had something I wanted to ask. Of course she’s thinking something horrible. “No Mom, nothing bad or scary,” I tell her. She lights up a cigarrette, and I tell her that I’ve talked with Scot to get his opinion and approval, and Alan and I would like for her to meet him. Scot said that while she is ok with knowing about it, she probably doesn’t want to be face to face with Alan. She says Scot is a smart man. I let her know that Alan is a permanent part of my life. We’ve been together for over two years now, and he shall be in my life forevermore. Therefore, it seems as though they should meet at least once. She met him at my hysterectomy, though then I just told her he was a “friend.” But it is important to us both that she validate his existence as my other partner. I know that him coming to grandmother’s for Christmas dinner would be a little far reaching, but I would love for him to be allowed to join us for dinner and ocassions with her from time to time. It is only fair and a sign of respect to him. She said she was impressed with my honesty and comfortableness with coming to her about it. And she said she will think about it. Hey, at least that’s not a “NO,”
I told Alan that in all honesty he reallyyyy doesn’t want to be around my grandparents. Hell, Scot doesn’t want to be around them very much either; nor do I. But it is a familial duty that I must endure. He wants to the right and opportunity to make the choice to be there or not. And I completely understand and respect that. I honestly couldn’t care less what my grandparents’ think of me. They don’t agree with most of my life choices anyways, so it would just be one more black mark on my already black sheep status. What do I have to fear, them taking me out of their will? Not so much effective as a scare tactic. My mom informed me though that my grandmother has a suspicion that I’m seeing someone else. Part of me just wants to be like.. well screw it then! Let me come completely out of the poly closet! My family already knows I’m bisexual (even if I’ve not bluntly told each of them). I’m just too much of an open and honest person… people tend to figure out my “secrets.” And mostly, it’s just because I dont’ really care what people think of me. They can either accept me or not. And if they don’t… their loss!!!
I’m sitting here watching “Pride and Prejudice,” and my sister texts me and asks me the name of my blog. I tell her that it’s a poly blog and she probably, no definitely, doesn’t want to read it. She asks me what “polyamory” is, and I tell her “many loves.” She then divuluges, “You do know that I know that you see other people besides Scott. It’s not like A secret.” Bwahahahha!!! Touche sistre! Yes, I know she knows this, but I also know that she doesn’t like having my “alternative lifestyle” thrown in her face. She says “true.” So I tell her.. wellllll, if you reallyyyy want to know, here it is. So dear readers…. my sister now knows, full disclosure, about my love and relationship with Scot and Alan! HA!!! So yeahhhhh,,, welcome sistre! Have fun reading my crazy adventures!
At least I don’t put up too much scandal on here! That’ll have to be on a separate blog! 😉 I want this one to be more of an educational/advocate/??? kind. Or something?
So now my mom and sister know completely that I’m poly. They both know I’m bisexual. Guess that wasn’t too incredibly hard to “come out” like I thought it would be! HA! It helps that I’m very open with my sister and mom. We certainly don’t have to “normal” 1950s “Leave it to Beaver” type family structure or relationship. So it makes this sort of thing wayyyy easier than it could be for some people.
But in all honesty, if my mom wasn’t cool with it, if my sister wasn’t cool with it, I would respect their opinion; but I would NEVER let it dissuade me from my life’s path. I would still be this way, and they’d just have to get used to it. They can either accept it or not. I will love my family no matter what. But my life is my own, just as their lives are theirs. God makes us each the way we are meant to be. And this is how He made me. And I feel blessed and thankful to know such love in so many realms of my life.
Part of me would really loveeee to just tell my grandparents simply to see the look on their faces! It would be AWESOME!! I could see their puzzlement, outrage, and hysteria right now. Huzzah!
This is not a phase people. This is not a drill. This is ME. This is who I AM. Love me or leave me.